It's not bad. Not bad. It's not ready, but...
- It's well produced. - Yeah?
It's a bit too polished, you know.
It lacks substance, it's a bit too calculated but...
No biggie. You can work on that.
- That's not the issue. - What is the issue?
The issue is you.
You're completely lost, aren't you?
First, you ditch me.
- Then you try to fuck me. What's the plan? - The plan is music. Only music.
- You already told me that. - You have to believe me.
It was just a misunderstanding.
Well...
I don't know why, but I still want to produce you.
You do?
But that's awesome!
That's sick. You'll see, I won't let you down.
It's going to be...
You all right?
Yeah, I'm fine.
- I'm going to go. - Okay.
Isn't this just great?
Hanging out as a family. Like two pairs of testes.
The honey is delicious, sweetheart.
- Oh, yeah? - Well, two and a half pairs!
- You want some more? - Yeah.
And I love co-sleeping with Eddy.
Should we go and buy... some bread?
Bread?
Yeah, we could.
At the...
organic bakery?
Oh, no! That's miles away. It's what? Like a 20-minute walk?
No, I can't be bothered.
No.
Yeah. Let's go buy some bread. Would 20 minutes be enough for you?
Yep.
We should do that every day.
For the rest of our lives?
Yeah.
Until death do us part?
Yeah.
I didn't cancel City Hall.
- But wait, it's... - It's today.
In two hours.
A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES
THE LAME PLAN
THE CRAZY PLAN
THE BOOTY PLAN
THE HOOK-UP PLAN
Guys, come on, I look like a dick.
- Right, is everyone here, can we start? - No.
Sorry. One of my witnesses is in a cab, and the other is on a flight, so...
Yes...
- Can we do this without witnesses? - No, we can't, sir.
Okay.
I came as quick as I could.
Thank you.
Is sir your witness?
Yes. He's his witness.
Okay.
Sorry!
There.
Are we good?
Do you, Emilie Chataigne,
take Mr. Antoine Ben Smires to be your lawfully wedded husband?
I do.
Do you, Mr. Antoine Ben Smires,
take Miss Emilie Chataigne to be your lawfully wedded wife?
I do.
Yes! Sorry.
By the power vested in me, I now pronounce Mr. Antoine Ben Smires
and Miss Emilie Chataigne husband and wife.
Yes!
Now the exchange of rings.
Here you go.
That's the one.
Yeah!
Look at Daddy! Look at him.
Come on, let's go and give Daddy a kiss.
To the happy couple!
Sorry.
Congratulations.
I'm next!
- You could have worn your wig! - Yeah...
- You're a dick. - Sorry to have missed it.
It's okay. I had Julio.
As my witness.
Nice of you to come to my wedding.
Sorry, guys.
At least, my brother's witness isn't a traitor.
- Guten Tag! - Matthieu!
- I didn't think I'd see you again so soon. - Me neither.
- I'm so happy! - Aren't you going to introduce us?
Yes, so, this is Verena.
Well, my hands are full.
- We just got off the plane. You okay? - Hi. You okay? Yeah. Sorry!
Sorry.
- Shall we go and have a drink? - Yes, I know where we can go.
- Careful, Chantal! - Wait, wait, I'll take it.
- You sure? - Yes, yes.
- Careful of the paint as you step up. - Cool!
- Wow! - Do you like it?
Yeah! We're so much better here than at the big château.
I'm glad the barge is being used for something.
Wait, why? Are you giving up on the incubator?
You can't do that, you worked like a maniac!
Well, we did, too.
Well, I tampered with the figures, and you botched the plans.
You fucked up, for sure.
I didn't really want to work, either. I mostly wanted to be with you.
If you don't go on without us, I'll throw you overboard.
- For real, I'll stop talking to you. - Maybe I could...
Maybe I could go on but...
but without Maxime.
I mean, he could step down in favor of a colleague, like...
like Chantal.
- He could? - Yeah.
Because if, at City Hall, they find out that he pulled strings for his ex...
Adios, Maxime.
- Go for it, baby! - Okay!
- Yeah. - That's awesome.
Do your laugh.
- The evil laugh? - Yes!
Oh, boy! They still love each other, for sure.
We can't leave her like this.
We'd be the worst friends in the world if we did nothing.
- We just need a plan. - A genius idea.
- Oh, shit, we're doing it again. - We're nuts.
- We've got to let her be, it's her life! - Yes, you're right!
- Don't look at her like that. It's weird. - Oh, yeah? Is it awkward?
No. Not at all.
Hey, there.
- Want to play tag-a-shag? - No, I'm okay.
Grandma! You're here.
Here's the big dickhead.
And the Nazi!
- Your granddaughter was worried. - Which one? The fat one?
Someone didn't take her meds!
Dude, I have a mission for you.
- Looking after Grandma. - Meaning?
You'll see, it's just like with Eddy, but easier.
One pill every hour or she gets aggressive.
- What's her name? - Simone.
- But everyone calls her Grandma Prozac. - Oh! He might still get laid.
You look even more retarded than the other one.
All right. Let's take the first pill, shall we?
THE KINGFISHER
- Grandma? - Yes?
This is what we call a playlist.
Doesn't ring a bell? No worries.
It's basically a compilation of 12" maxi singles.
Except that this is shit.
So?
Go and join her, you idiot!
- Yes, Grandma, come here. - But...
She's great. Yes, come here.
- You okay? - Yeah, I'm fine. You?
Yeah.
Do you, by any chance, have something to tell me?
No.
Can you pay me or not?
- No. - Right, so, you have to fire me.
- Right now? - I think so.
Oh, no! No, no, no. You're pressuring me.
- It sucks, right? - Yeah, but not right now.
- It's not the right time. - It is.
It's too much, I swear. Not like this.
- Charlotte, it's your job. - Yeah, but no.
- Are you a boss or not? - I am.
So? What's a boss supposed to do?
- You're my boss, so fire me. - Yeah.
Uh... okay. You're fired.
See?
- Feels good, right? - Yeah. You're fired.
- Once again? - Fuck off, you're fired!
- Oh, fuck, it feels good! - Yeah, it does.
And now... Now we can work together.
Yeah. I mean, no, how? Why?
Yes, because I inherited some money.
I didn't really know what to do with it, but I think now I do.
I'll buy Pinkars.
- I'll buy half of Pinkars. If you want. - Okay.
- Yeah. - You and I would become associates.
- Is that a yes? - Yeah!
You can't do that!
- It's dangerous! - What? I can do what I want!
Are you out of your mind, Mom?
You and Milou have never been so in love, right?
Maybe. But it's mostly never been so simple, and that...
that feels good.
I think spending some time apart can actually be a good thing.
Well, that depends.
Don't worry, he doesn't care about her.
- You think she's better than me? - Are you crazy?
Have you seen her? Have you seen yourself?
Best bro del mundo.
- I can't take it, I'm forcing fate, okay? - Okay.
Let's go dance! Let's go dance!
- Oh, no. - Oh, yes!
- You're asking me to dance? - Yep. At my own wedding!
Hey, nice moves you've got there!
Wow!
Yeah, let's dance!
- Champagne, Elsa? - No.
- Okay... - No, Max!
No, I'm fine.
- No? - No.
- Always such a pain! - I was just offering her some champagne.
You're such a pain!
- Okay. - Don't you have something to tell me?
- About? - Well...
Oh, yeah, sorry. It happened super fast.
Maybe a bit too fast, no?
- I'm in love, Charlotte. - Oh, shut up.
Leidenschaft. It's German for passion.
Oh, right, okay.
No, that's great. I mean...
Too bad because it happened right when I started to feel that...
- What? - Well, I...
No, forget about it.
Wait, if...
- It's fine. - You have feelings?
- Well... - I mean, you still have feelings for me?
Because it's still early days.
It's not... Love is a big word, it's not like...
You still love me!
- I'm sorry. - Fucking got you!
You dig me! You dig me!
Why are you doing this?
Why? That's so mean.
- You're the mean one! - That was a trap!
Bringing that lame chick here, right under my nose.
That phony love story of yours.
- Aren't you a bit jealous? - Well...
I'll be jealous the day a girl makes you happier than I do.
You've set the bar high.
You too.
The girls sent me to check on the anchor.
They did?
Oh, shoot.
Wait.
How does this thing work?
Wait, I think they just wanted us to be together.
Right.
- So, we're not checking on the anchor? - We're not.
- Because it was an excuse. Yeah. - It was.
- At least, we tried. - Yeah. That's something.
And it was nice.
Very nice, even.
Actually, we were like dolphins from a theme park.
They get released into the ocean and...
and then you find them, two weeks later, beached, like pieces of shit, dead.
Because they weren't ready.
I thought I was stronger.
I thought I was less fragile.
So, we're basically the same.
They say birds of a feather flock together...
- Yeah, that's super dumb. - It's dumb.
- You know, when we broke up... - I don't want to know.
Because you're living your life, I'm living mine, and...
We're getting over all this...
and we're healing.
- Okay, I'm going back in. Yeah. - Yeah.
Oh, and you know, some dolphins survive.
They're injured, but they survive.
Okay, I'm going.
Yeah!
Oh, no! Not a conga line! Who started it?
I did, bitch!
- Come on! Let's climb! - Let's go!
Up, up, up!
Wait, wait.
Excuse me.
I know speeches are always... always a bit of compulsory exercise.
- Hey! Oh! - I don't even know where Emilie is.
- You're leaving? - She's over there.
I'm sorry to leave now but...
it's better this way.
Well...
- No, I'm the one who's sorry. - We are! We're sorry.
No, it's true, we... we didn't go easy on you.
- Well, mostly her. She was a real bitch. - Mostly her.
What? No, you.
- Come on. Please. - You're such a pain!
Anyway, let's make peace.
You were my brother's witness, you're almost a Ben Smires now!
Thanks.
- Have fun, anyway, and congratulations. - ...with Emilie, perhaps.
Ah, there we go. So, what is love?
Love is embarking on a boat and trusting it.
A boat that was docked until then.
Just dicked... docked.
And a boat that tried to leave today.
To get out, to face real life.
Sometimes storms.
Sometimes the swell.
The swell that can make an unbalanced boat pitch.
And that leads to puking.
At first, it's just food that hasn't been digested properly,
but then it can be bile, and that stains.
On teak, typically, you can't get rid of it.
But we're not here to talk about me, we're here to talk about your love.
And about this boat...
which can weather the storm.
This is when you need to be strong.
I couldn't do it.
I think it's important to fight.
We all saw Titanic.
Hi, Elsa. I don't know when you'll listen to this track.
I made it for you when everything was going well.
So, here it is.
It's not finished, but it's yours.
...when you fall out of the boat of love.
Love is a treasure we need to fight for.
- Love is... - Sorry. Excuse me.
Julio!
Yes, it's me!
Elsa-Elsa!
I mean, you know that, because you can see me.
So, I wanted to make the most of this intimate moment.
And apparently, we have music, too.
But that's pretty fitting for...
for me to tell you that I get it.
I understand.
I only got it ten minutes ago, but I got it.
You're the best dirty trick anyone's ever played on me.
No, wait! Wait!
Wait! I mean, no, you can leave if you want.
I'm not talking to stop you from leaving.
I just don't want to regret anything.
I don't know what you think about it but...
stopping, starting again, starting over, it's not ideal, fine.
But that sounds like us... right?
And we can love each other several times, no?
No?
I wanted to tell you that...
that it ain't over.
It ain't over till it's over.
- Yes! - It's the only thing that matters.
It ain't over
Why am I doing this?
It ain't over till it's over
It ain't over
I'm doing this for you, Julio!
It ain't over till it's over
It ain't over
It ain't over till it's over!
I'm going!
It ain't over
- It ain't over - Come on!
- So, you're not ashamed of me anymore? - Who cares? No one's looking.
Look at them!
Time to kiss!
Time to kiss! Time to kiss!
With tongue!
Oh, look at them!
And to think they met thanks to me.
- Well, to us. - To me.
- No, to us. - Yeah, to me.
- No, to us. - I started all this!
Yeah, but you mostly screwed up.
- I screwed up! It was me! - That's negative.
- It was me! It was me! - It's negative!
- Wow, your sister is such a pain. - Oh, but I agree with her.
- What? - It's thanks to her.
- It was me. Best bro del mundo! - Yeah, right.
- Best bro del mundo! - Sure, whatever.
Best bro del mundo!
Subtitle translation by Julia Knapp